Which Kind of Success Do You Want?
There are two kinds of success -
2. Deeply fulfilling, joyous success
Both have very different paths and outcomes.
In the first, you only play the Outer Game. In the second, you play both the Outer Game and the Inner Game, along with the Game That Connects the Two.
The first is achieved with velocity, like the hare. The second requires patience, like the tortoise. The first is a sprint. The second is a marathon.
I laughed my head off when I read a senior executive lament in a book yesterday - I hate personal growth. Such an echo of my experience of my own journey, and of the journeys of others I walk along with.
The first is about being an ostrich and putting your head in the sand. The second is about being willing to go to places one is scared to go to, being willing to look in the mirror and see things one would rather not, being willing to hold oneself responsible for all the mess in the world, being willing to acknowledge and own one's own greatness, and live in the expression of one's inner Light.
The Outer Game is that of Business Excellence through which you lead your organization from good to great, making a dent in the Universe, making that huge difference in the world through the work you do.
The Inner Game is that of Leadership Depth through which you journey inside to become aware of your own fears and transform each one into love.
The Game that Connects the Two is that of Craft Mastery through which become the master of your craft, the world's best in your industry, the thought leader in your domain.
The three Games are really three journeys you undertake to connect to your genius, to leave footprints in the sand of time, to live the purpose of your life.
The outcome of playing all the three games is having your Wheel of Life in perfect balance - deeply fulfilling successful career, loving harmonious relationships at home and at work, happy responsible kids with their genius joyfully expressed, nourishing nurturing me-time, making a difference.
The interesting bit is that each of these 5 areas of your Wheel of Life are like a juggler's balls up in the air. Either all five will be up in the air or all will come crashing on the ground progressively, some point in time.
If you are going through a midlife crisis, fall on your knees and thank the heavens for a loving reminder for you to play all the three games to be on the path for the second kind of success.
Wishing you the courage to listen to the the silent voice in your head and find your way home.
Swinging It Right...
After 2 years of sweating it out on the range and struggling on the golf course, saw a glimmer of light in the game yesterday. Here are my learnings:
1. Learning is like a hockey stick, especially if you do it the right way. Your reduce your results in the beginning because you are unlearning a lot of stuff. Your performance goes right down to rock bottom and then the turn-around happens. It's really about slowing down to speed up.
2. You have to have childlike trust and faith in your coach. Without that, I wouldn’t have been able to sustain the phase of unlearning to hit rock bottom. Imagine my consternation (humiliation is a more honest choice of word), when someone who had started playing only a month back was hitting longer shots than me in a game we were playing together. Without that trust, I would have dumped my kit in the nearest garbage bin and walked out to go back to squash :-)
3. You have to have pollyanna optimism in the face of everything that isn’t working. At the beginning of the year, when I wrote down my 2018 one-pager, I declared to myself that I would end the year with 18 handicap when I wasn’t even able to hit one in 10 balls. Now, 9 in 10 balls are up in the air and 5 of them in the direction I intended. My coach says I will hit my target and I am going along with that :-)
4. There is truth in the 10,000 hours and daily practise. My 9-year old son has declared he wants to be a professional golfer. So, being a big believer in ‘focus on the input side of things’, the 10,000 hours and daily practise, we hit the golf course 6 days of the week. Fortunately, the club is closed once a week :-) This daily practise thing has done more magic to my swing than anything else. Of course, only clocking 10,000 hours is not of any value, if you aren’t practising the right technique as my son reminds me.
5. if you don’t love what you are doing, you will never be able to clock the 10,000 hours to cut-over to mastery. You will be fighting your inner resistance more than enjoying the process of learning. Either fall in love with what you do or find something that you love. Both paths lead you to freedom.
6. You have a choice, in golf and in life - play a good game or play a great game. Both are very different paths and have very different outcomes. Be aware of the choice you are making.
7. My coach says you have to be the fittest person you know before you can be the best golfer. Your physical body is the only house you are getting to live in this lifetime. The well-being of your physical body depends on work on itself; and the well-being of your mental, spiritual and emotional bodies.
8. Einstein credits his success as a scientist to his ability to step away to his violin. I totally get him when I step away to walk into the golf course. What do you step away into to find your source of creativity & innovation.
9. Golf connects us. Once a week, it is family golf where all four of us spend 3 hours together, anger or upset, in the beautiful tranquil greens walking together from hole to hole, away from the busy-ness of life, no longer being able to run away from each other or from one's own self, experiencing the joy of being together. It took me 3 years to make this happen. Intentions get fulfilled, only if you stay with them long enough.
What is the new thing that you are learning and what is your biggest insight from there?
I Struggled with Meditation...
I struggled with meditation. Tried different methodologies, nothing gave me the stillness that I thought I should get.
I now realize it wasn't because there was something missing in the different systems. The truth is that something was missing in me. Also, different approaches work for different people at different times as I realize in my own coach journey. Not every coach is for me and I am not everyone's coach. It is a process of discovery and feeling the connection.
It's only when I found myself in a Vipassana Centre on a 10-day Silence Retreat that I found my connection. I discovered that meditation is simply a process of self-observation, of stepping away from the life outside to step inside, of gathering the scattered attention broken in 1000 pieces and holding it together within you.
Thomas Edison was hugely ineffective at fishing. He never caught a fish though he would fish for an hour daily because he never used the bait. He said that way everyone left him alone - people and even the fish. This was his way of gathering his scattered self and journeying inwards. He credited this process for his prolific inventions.
I find my biggest, most creative, innovative ideas simply float by when I am meditating. It's worth figuring out your way to come home to yourself.
R M Vishakha
Managing Director & CEO, IndiaFirst Life Insurance Company Ltd
Click the link to read the interview with R M Vishakha on CEO Success Habits
You know you have arrived in Life when:
1. You can look at white strands on your hair or balding pate and smile to yourself in the mirror, without the urge to get your hair coloured or your head covered.
2. Your little one spills his paints on your exquisite silk carpet just before the big party and you don't come crashing down on him.
3. Your kids fail and you still see their Genius shining through. Infact, you together celebrate the failure.
4. You are less about what dresses you have in your cupboard, and more about the next thing you are going to learn.
5. You can see beauty in the wrinkles of the old man begging on the road. In fact, you can see beauty in your own wrinkles winking back at you from the mirror.
6. The lone green tree on the way to your office fills your heart with joy, instead of sadness for the eroding greenery.
7. Your Good Morning to the guy sweeping the floor in your office and to your biggest client has the same smile, acknowledgement and joy of welcome.
8. NOs don't pull you down and YESs don't fill you up with excitement. In either case, you are filled with the joy of living purposefully.
9. You can feel love and reverence in your heart for every Being around you.
10. You can see and feel the perfection in all the apparent chaos outside in the world and inside in your heart, head, body & spirit.
11. Your focus is so sharp that there is joy and fulfilment in simply focussing on what you are doing.
12. Your intentions are in the future but your attention is solidly in the present moment.
13. You have discovered that the reason you are part of a particular family, group, organization, community, country is so that you can be of service to them.
14. Your word is your life and you are willing to be the only person to show up for a meeting or a get-together just because you gave your word. You expected a crowd and only one person shows up for your show. You give him the very best and even better than your best, because you gave your word that you will.
15. You no longer seek love, approval and appreciation from outside to feel complete because your own love, approval and appreciation for your own self completes you.
16. You can feel love in people's criticism for you.
17. You pull the world to your peace rather than get pulled into the chaos.
18. You have the courage to be vulnerable. You bring people closer to yourself and to each other by your willingness to drop all your masks and be vulnerable & authentic,
19. You one-line growth strategy in Life is to do things that make you feel uncomfortable.
20. You love doing what embarrasses you because you like a good laugh at yourself.
21. You like to hear other people talk more than hear your own voice - either through your mouth or in your head. You prefer to be interested rather than interesting.
22. You keep digging in to discover hidden fears to bring them into the light of the day to face them head-on rather then let them lie hidden under the carpet festering.
23. Broken roads, polluted air, creaking infrastructure in your city doesn't bring you down because you feel responsible for everything in your space and find a creative outlet for your anger, frustration by making a difference instead of grumbling and complaining.
24. You read a book standing in a queue or even better, engage in a joyous conversation with strangers standing next to you; rather than impatiently shuffle around or keep checking in to know how many likes you have on which social media site or get busy with whatsapp.
25. You know social media makes you anti-social and what makes you social is to meet people in person. You have the willpower to get on social media only once a day for a power session of 1 hour or less.
When you have arrived, you will discover that you have it all - deeply fulfilling successful career, loving harmonious relationships at work and at home, happy responsible kids with their genius joyfully expressed, lots of nourishing nurturing me-time, while making a huge difference in the world. Oh, yes, you can have it all. The question is - Are you willing to learn, grow and evolve to create it for yourself.
All communication is really about enrolling people to say yes to your proposal - whether it is communicating your new business strategy to your organization or requesting support from your not-so inspired direct-report team which was your peer group only a month back or telling your teen that her request for a night-out has not been accepted. Even if the context of the conversation is not difficult, it is worthwhile to understand the art and science of communication for a joyous, fulfilling experience.
Dancing in a Conversation
If you experience the rhythmic, effortless, joyous flow in your conversation and can feel fulfilment at all levels - intellectually (stimulating, mentally stretching you), emotionally (makes you feel happy and inspired), spiritually (the conversation connects with you, to what you are upto this lifetime, your purpose) and physically (body feels relaxed, refreshed and rejuvenated); you are dancing in a conversation with someone who will have the same experience.
As you dance together in your conversation, both of you find a way forward that supports both of you to grow. This is how every communication is meant to be. Then, why it isn't so?
Are We Really Speaking the Same Language?
We may be speaking the same language and yet we are not. Imagine what we are talking about as the Reality is at the centre of a sphere. The conversation is between people who are all looking at this Reality but are standing at different points on the sphere. At different points, what you see of the Reality shifts not because the Reality is different but because it looks different from the spot you are standing at. I would call each point on the sphere from which you view reality as a Point of View.
Imagine the million points of view for the same Reality. Also at many points, the views will contradict each other. And, yet, all views represent the truth from where it is looked from. Therefore, all views are valid, however contradictory. Without getting this, no communication can really be effective.
What is needed is someone with greater leadership depth. (S)he will have the wisdom to walk to the point where the other is standing and dance in conversation there. Then, together move to another point and dance in conversation there as well. No longer the need to pull each other down, pull each other's hair shouting at top of your voice - I am right. You are wrong.
Then our experience of a conversation will shift from 2-left feet dancing to something more graceful, joyous and fulfilling.
What are the Six Walls that Block the Dance of Communication?
We have six walls that divide each of us from each other, six walls that our communication has to pierce through before it reaches the other. With each wall, the communication distorts and that is why our frustration at the other person not understanding what we are really communicating.
Here are the six walls:
1. Our default limiting view of our own self
2. Our default limiting view of the other
3. Our default limiting view of life itself
4. The other's default limiting view of their own self
5. The other's default limiting view of others (that includes us)
6. The other's default limiting view of life itself
It requires a very high level of self-awareness to be present to what these views are. These limiting views, thought patterns are the legacy of human being's survival based evolutionary process. The journey to cut-over to our innate greatness (to be a Gear 5 Leader) begins with turning the torch inwards to deeply understand our mind's default limiting circuitry and re-wiring the brain through inner transformation and evolution.
It doesn't matter what the other's default limiting views are because those walls drop down when we, going beyond our fear, drop our three walls.
Interestingly, we can clearly see other people's limiting views but cannot see our own. That is why they are called Blind Spots - those aspects of you that are blocking you from growth and you cannot even see what they are. Focussing on other peoples' limiting ways of being only leads us to rabbit holes in which we keep meandering endlessly without any light at the end of the tunnel.
It is when you look in the mirror and begin to see how you are projecting your own views on to the world that real breakthroughs begin to happen.
What is the Role of Vulnerability and Authenticity?
Vulnerability is to have the courage to be authentic about your own inauthenticities, your own fears; it is to give yourself the permission to drop your armour and allowing the real you to be engaged with people around you. Authenticity is to show up as who you are, with nothing to hide, nothing to prove, with no hidden agenda. Sharing personal stories are powerful way to be vulnerable and authentic.
Great leadership has been researched and proven to be linked with vulnerability and authenticity. You will trust me if I communicate with vulnerability and authenticity. You cannot bring that in specific communications, it has to be your way of being for it to show up in your conversations.
Vulnerability and authenticity creates music for you to dance in a conversation. Without the music, the dance will get dreary & disengaging beyond a point and cause fatigue & stress.
What about Tone and Body Language?
Many trainers spend a large part of their training on the tone and body language for communication impact. That is like trying to look like Elvis Presley and expecting to sing like him. Tone and body language, sure, have an impact on the listener but you need to work with the source of the tone and body language. The source is what's going on inside of you - emotions and thoughts, your way of being. If you are feeling angry and don't even say a word, people around you still experience your anger and respond to that. Any response to anger or any other limiting emotion & thought is always ineffective - whether it is from yourself or from others.
There are only two source emotions - Love and Fear. All emotions will fall in one of these two buckets. Fear is a response to being stuck in the past or future. Love can be experienced only in being in the present moment. The inner journey of Leadership is really the journey from the evolutionary Fear to Love, which is the next stage of our evolution. When you shift from Fear to Love, your tone and body language will follow suit; and have your audience listen to you with rapt attention energized by the Love that you are.
How to Use Words that Make an Impact?
Words are powerful. They can create or they can destroy. They can inspire or they can de-energize. Our words (in our head and what comes through our mouth) create our world. Notice the difference between -
Your project is delayed.
What can you do to bring your project back to track?
The first is an observation and the second is an inquiry. The first will lead the other to defend and justify the delay. While, the second will open a discussion to identify ways to bring the project back to track.
Here's how to leverage this observation to communicate powerfully:
1. Learn from Socrates and lead with questions.
2. During 90% of the conversation, listen to identify an even more powerful question to ask. In your 10%, ask questions to create an opportunity for you to listen for 90% of the time.
3. When the other is talking, hold your tongue on the palate of your mouth or watch your breath to still your thoughts to bring your presence and listening to the other person.
If who you are having a conversation with feels small in your space, you will not get their joyous alignment, agreement and partnership; nor their productivity, creativity and innovation thinking.
Conversation of Equals Vs Conversations Looking Up / Down
A dance is possible only between equals. Observe yourself if your relationship with others is that of equals - even if they happen to be levels above you or levels below you. Or your relationship with others is an unequal relationship - either you are looking up and communicating; or looking down and communicating.
You are likely to be in the second state, if you haven't as yet embraced your inner judge / inner critic who is constantly judging and criticizing you.
Effective communication is about evolving to the relationship of equals with oneself and with others.
What is Your Purpose in All That You Do?
Your purpose of life shifts you from cutting stone to building a cathedral. This is your strong Why of your life. This is the over-arching context inside of which all the above pieces fall into their place to make a meaningful picture of the jigsaw puzzle of your life. If your purpose doesn't move you to tears; doesn't touch, move and inspire you; you haven't found it as yet.
What about Public Speaking?
Public Speaking is about bringing all the above elements to communicate powerfully to a large audience for your intended outcome. You will find yourself inspiring your audience to powerful action and enjoying dancing in a conversation with your audience, once you bring all the above elements together:
1. Speak the same language as your audience by looking at the world from their shoes
2. Understand the Six Walls that Block the Dance of Communication and be willing to drop your three walls for all six walls to fall down
3. Be vulnerable and authentic
4. Create the right tone and body language by working on the source
5. Understand how words make an impact. Lead with questions to increase the engagement with your audience
6. Learn to have a relationship of Equals with people in your life
7. Be connected to your Purpose in all that you do
Keep making a difference.
Your Teen is Your Coach
My 12-year old remarked yesterday that its not the kids who go wonky when they turn 13 but parents who turn wonky when their kids become 13.
I reflected on her observation and found so much truth in that. At work, when you move from being an individual performer to taking the new role of a manager or from a CXO to a CEO; if you haven't increased your leadership depth, you won't last too long in your new position. Whatever helped you to get to this position will now block you from moving forward. The advantage that we have at work is that; in a mature organization, till an individual does not display leadership depth of one level above, (s)he is not really promoted.
Unfortunately, Nature doesn't have such a process where we are not allowed to become parents till the time we display the leadership depth to play that role and neither is there a performance appraisal at the time our kids turn teenagers. Though Nature does have a powerful mechanism to show us whether we have evolved to play the role we took on, by us beginning to experience trouble with our kids.
If you have tantrum kids, teens who shut their world on you, young adults who rather avoid you; know you haven't grown your leadership depth to lead them to live in the expression of their innate genius. Even if you have one complaint about your kids - he should do this, she doesn't do that etc,; know it's not them who need mentoring, counselling, coaching; it is you.
One of my clients had a big problem with his 8 year old son. His son was perpetually lost in his own world, was irresponsible in his father's world because he would leave his tiffin box or notebooks behind at school, wouldn't communicate with other kids. The teacher had complaints about the son in every parent teacher meeting because he was not moving forward (academically, socially, emotionally) at the pace the rest of the class was. He signed up with me as his coach because his business had plateaued and he could not find the access to grow it. We worked together for a year, he discovered how his business was mirroring him, also how his son was mirroring him. He had various powerful insights on how he was stuck emotionally in his relationship with his wife and his staff at work, how his way of being was giving him no inner peace. He is a brave man. Unlike many others, he understood in the first month itself that his outer was a reflection of his inner; that no amount of banging his head against his business, his relationships, all of his outer world (like he had been doing for many years now and was coming to a dead-end everywhere) was going to make a difference; till he looked in the mirror and transformed himself (emotionally, spiritually, mentally and physically). He took responsibility of his life, professionally and personally, like he had never thought possible before; found courage to take powerful actions which were unimaginable before because of underlying hidden fears. His performance, productivity exploded; business grew at a pace not known before; relationship with his wife transformed - from him being a martyr to them becoming friends. Towards the end of the first year of coaching, he came back to share that his son's teacher had declared his son as one of the most responsible kids in the class and reported that he was at the top 10% of his class.
If your business / career is not growing at the velocity that you would like, your staff is not performing, kids are becoming unmanageable, you don't experience your spouse' love, stress level at work is high, your health is not at its best, you don't have time to do what you love; then it is time to look in the mirror, you will find the person responsible for your state of affairs looking right back at you. The default response of rebuking, criticizing that person will pull you further down into a negative spiral. It may sound counter-intuitive, but the first step is to accept and love that person unconditionally. That itself will need a massive shift in consciousness. I call that the first gear of Leadership. If you are thirsty, you cannot give water to others. If you deprive yourself of your own love and reverence; you cannot give to or receive from others (that includes your kids, your spouse, your parents, your staff) love and reverence. That is the foundation on which your performance & productivity, your ability to increase your impact in the world (in a sustainable way) and everything else about your life rests.
Wishing you the Leadership Depth to have it all - deeply fulfilling, hugely successful career; loving harmonious relationships; happy, responsible kids with their genius joyfully expressed; lots of nourishing nurturing me-time; making a difference, leaving footprints in the sand of time.
How to Lose Weight and Be Fit?
I am writing on this topic because, at the heart of it, personal leadership needs to be strengthened to have the ability to lose weight, be fit and maintain it. Also, this is one of the by-products that my clients have experienced. So, I feel I am qualified to write on this subject :-)
Let's first deconstruct. The Being of the Human Being has not one, but four bodies. None of your intentions will get fulfilled with power and velocity, if you do not recognize that. So, what are those 4 bodies -
1. Spiritual Body
2. Emotional Body
3. Mental Body
4. Physical Body
If you are seeking mastery, professionally and personally, you need to strengthen each of your 4 bodies. If you research masters, people who have cut-over to the other side of greatness leaving the ashes of mediocrity behind, they have grown at all the 4 levels because that is part of the process, part of the inner strengthening for creating the outer success.
Therefore, in order to lose weight, we need to do the work at all the four bodies:
1. Spiritual Body - This part of us is about our highest purpose; about our being connected to our purpose through the work we do and through the way we live; about living purposefully moment by moment; about experiencing deep connection with ourselves, with each one around us and with the Universe itself. You can assess the health of this body by giving yourself a rating out of 10 for the questions - Why am I doing all of this? What is my purpose?
Linking it back to being overweight, be in the inquiry of the questions - Why am I allowing myself to be fat? What is my purpose in letting me be fat? The importance of an inquiry is not that you get clear answers but take responsibility and experience that viscerally, rather than hide behind numerous excuses. The reality is that you are fat / unfit and it is your choice to be like that.
One of my clients wanted to quit smoking. In our coaching conversation, he had a powerful insight that he was using smoking to push emotions, that he didn't want to confront, under the carpet. It was his way of numbing his emotions. He learnt to feel gratitude for smoking instead of feeling guilty and powerless about it because he found the purpose behind his smoking habit. It was to teach him to love himself unconditionally and to get the strength to face his emotions to evolve to the next level. He learnt to use his cigarette as a partner in progress to point towards parts of him (his emotions) that he did not want to acknowledge, rather than as a crutch to escape parts of himself. Smoking quit him, instead of him struggling to quit smoking because it had fulfilled its role of supporting him on his human journey to learn, grow and evolve to his highest self.
2. Emotional Body - High Performers spend their entire lifetime turning their face away from their emotions, so much so that after a point they lose the ability to feel real emotions. Oh yes, we can pretend to be happy with all the success and wealth we have created. We are also so super smart that we end up fooling ourselves to believe that this happiness is the real thing and keep ourselves distracted with exciting hobbies we take on, going to exotic destinations for vacations and take up meditation. The experience of loneliness is acute and we hide that by working even harder, by becoming even more busy being busy. The first questions all my super successful clients ask me is - What is fulfilment? How do you define success? How do I feel intimacy with my loved ones - my spouse, kids and parents?
I learnt the answers the hard way. The only access is to first acknowledge that you do have an Emotional Body, that emotions are like little children who will hide in different parts of your body (causing dis-ease including fat) if they experience you pushing them away.
Fat, as per Louise Hay, often represents Fear and shows a need for protection. As per her, the Fear may be a cover for hidden anger and a resistance to forgive. Isn't it interesting? What's more interesting is that men usually have belly fat and women usually collect fat in their hips & thighs. Belly fat is anger at being denied emotional nourishment. Hips & thigh fat is packed childhood anger, often rage at the father.
Work at the emotional level is needed to remain fit and allow fat to leave you.
3. Mental Body - I won't spend much time here because we spend our lives entirely in this body. At this body, what is needed is to recognize the limiting thought patterns that underlie the emotional state described above. It is not about forcibly stopping your thoughts, or trying to drop them. That doesn't work. It is about allowing the limiting thoughts to let go of you. This is a 4-stage process from being unconscious of your limiting thought patterns, to being conscious, to being aware and finally transformation takes place when you find yourself free from the grip of your limiting thought patterns.
Byron Katie in her powerful book 'Loving What Is' shares a step-by-step process for this.
Meditation is a powerful process for stilling the mind. Don't use this to escape your emotions, use the process for self-observation. I find Vipassana very powerful and personally use it. There are numerous other approaches. You need to find one that you connect with.
4. Physical Body - Here you need to work at three levels:
a. What you are eating, how you are eating and when you are eating? I find Ayurveda, the ancient healing system of India, very comprehensive and scientific. Infact, most spiritual organizations run their own version of Healthy Eating Programs.
b. Which physical exercise regimen you are following? How consistent are you? In my experience, Yoga (the ancient physical disciplining system of India) is the most structured exercising approach to health and wellbeing.
c. How are you breathing? Pranayam, part of the Yoga Practise, teaches highly effective breathing exercises.
You may choose to love being fat or choose to use it to find your way to greater freedom, greater performance & productivity and greater outer success by starting your inner journey of personal transformation.
Whatever you may choose, know that you are whole, complete and perfect the way you are. Without experiencing that, you will not make progress.
There are two ways of living - either life creates you or you create life, either you are at the effect of life or you are at the source of it, either life makes you dance or you make life dance to your tune. All it takes is a CHOICE to cut-over to the other side.
Once a choice has been made, the next step is a powerful articulation of what outcome you want to create in order to bring it into reality. All organizations that cut-over to greatness had a powerful purpose / vision. The bigger the purpose, higher the organizations landed on the road to greatness. For Steve Jobs, it was to make a contribution to the world by making tools for the mind that advance humankind. For Bill Gates, it was to put a computer on every desk and in every home.
You need a deeply connecting purpose that is much bigger than who you are right now to grow with velocity. If your purpose is not impossible, your growth trajectory is going to be limited. If your vision of what you want to do in this lifetime doesn't scare you, it isn't big enough. If you want the kind of success that Walt Disney created for himself, then you have to have a mindset like his - It's quite fun to do the impossible.
The first step is to make a choice to cut-over to greatness, remembering good is the enemy of great. We never aspire for greatness, just because we are happy with 'good'. Nothing wrong with that, just that the synonym of 'good' is mediocrity. The road of mediocrity is a downward spiral. Only two things can happen in your life then - spiral downwards on the road of mediocrity or spiral upwards to your greatest self. The first is the default, no action is needed from us.
The second step is to create your purpose that lights you up, brings back stars in your eyes and joy in your heart.
The third step is to decide your outcomes for the year which will lead you to fulfil on your purpose this lifetime. Without this future integration, life is likely to meander along; maybe with speed but without joyous fulfilment.
What is your BREAKTHROUGH GOAL for the year? If you were only allowed to focus on ONE goal on your list, which goal would be most likely to ensure that EVERY other goal was accomplished ANYWAY—even if you were not allowed to work on them. Identifying the breakthrough goal, aligned with your purpose this life-time, allows you to prioritize your energy at the 20% of the list that will account for 80% of your success and fulfilment. Without clarity on this, there cannot be focussed effort. Incidentally, having a professional breakthrough goal does not mean putting in only a little energy in other areas of our wheel of life (relationships at home and at work, kids, nourishing me-time, making a difference) because when the wheel of our life is out of balance, we lose energy rapidly leaving us with no horsepower to work on our breakthrough goal.
The fourth step is to break down the breakthrough goal for the year into DAILY process goals. Without clarity on what you would do daily, each day will get frittered away landing us at the end of the year with the outcome of the year still beautifully laid out only on the paper.
The fifth step is to have your purpose, outcome goals and breakthrough goal for the year, and daily process goals available for daily reference through a Vision Board and / or one-pager for the year.
The sixth step is to build your weekly and daily schedule in integrity with your Daily Process Goals.
The seventh step is to take action daily as per your schedule, review and reflect at the end of the day for learnings, insights and change in action, if any.
Wishing you meaning, purpose and impact because that leads you to joy, success and prosperity.
Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.