Jyoti Gulati
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Don't Forget Your Upsets, Drop Them

4/8/2017

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​Don't forget your upsets, instead drop them. When you forget them, they simply go under the carpet from your conscious mind into your subconscious mind causing even more harm.

Why not continue being upset? Because it puts your physical body through dis-ease and you lose your vitality, energy and health; it also reduces your performance & productivity and shuts the door to your creativity & innovation. If something makes you lose so much, why continue holding on to it. Don't make the mistake of forgetting your upset because it is only going deeper and deeper inside of you where you won't be able to access it; and it will launch a guerilla warfare on you.

How to drop the upset? Let me put things in context before attempting to answer this question for you. If you put reality at the centre and walk around it in a circle, will you not get 360 degree different views of the same reality? Infact at 180 degree, you will have two views of the same reality which contradict each other. Aren't the two contradictory views equally valid? The real question is then which point to stand at to look at reality. How about standing at that point which gives you the power to walk on the path to your highest self for you to live in the expression of your Genius. You may not believe you are a Genius. I believe you are a Genius. Remember both are valid views, just that we are 180 degrees apart. Which view will you choose to hold on to? I would recommend pick up the view that gives you power to take action to create the life you want.

Having established that there can be a multitude of views of the same reality, let me share a view from a point to answer the question - How to drop the upset? Experiment with it. If it works for you, embrace it. If it doesn't, throw it out of the window and find another view that supports your growth because all our action is inside of how the world occurs to us. If we shift how the world occurs to us, we can shift our actions. Unfortunately, the other way around is like banging your head on the wall. 

How to drop the upset? A view from a point.

1. Take 100% responsibility of what the other did to you. 

E = mcˆ2, is a famous equation in German-born physicist Albert Einstein’s Theory of Special Relativity that expresses the fact that mass and energy are the same physical entity and can be changed into each other.

Remember Newton's third law - For every action, there's an equal and opposite reaction.


If we put the above two scientifically proven facts together, isn't it obvious that we are in an energy system and if something is coming to us, we must have given it out sometime back. In that case, are we not 100% responsible for how people react to us and how our circumstances are?

2. Forgive yourself for having to suffer what the other did to you and give yourself unconditional love & acceptance.

If you are 100% responsible for all that happens in your space, forgive yourself first. There is no other way to move forward. The moment you forgive yourself, the resistance within you drops and you become whole and complete. Your scattered mind comes together.

Lets take an example here. Supposing, someone was mean to you. As long as you struggle with it, your mind is divided. One part of the mind is feeling upset at the meanness and the other part of the mind is resisting the other part feeling the upset. So, your energies are divided. If you forgive yourself for having to experience the pain and embrace the part of you feeling upset, suddenly the mind becomes one as the resistance between the two parts drops. 


3. Forgive the other.

Without that, we are carrying the poison in our body. You can have three perspectives with respect to the Universe. 
a. The Universe is kind, loving and supportive. I have childlike trust and faith in the Universe.
b. The Universe is against me. Everything is a struggle for me.
c. The Universe - What the hell is it?

In my study of people who have cut over to the other side of mastery, genius; they have the first view. They may not have started with that view but they always end up there. The smart thing is to copy the emotional, physical, mental and spiritual habits of the masters, the geniuses, the people who reached their highest self and live their lives as an expression of that. If you do that, you will progress faster towards your own greatness.

If you choose the view that the Universe is kind, loving and supportive and taking care of you; then whatever others do to you and however difficult circumstances you find yourself in, wouldn't all that be for your greatest good, for your accelerated growth. If you choose this view, you will find it easy to forgive the other. We are not approving what the other did, all that we are doing is forgiving the best part of them.

4. Shift to gratitude

Forgiveness opens us into a vast empty space; left behind by our letting go of bitterness & resentment, cynicism & resignation. If we do not consciously fill up that space with something, something else will fill it up without our awareness that may not serve us. Why not make the choice to fill it up with gratitude, a deep thankfulness for all that is there; shift our focus from the lack, scarcity & yearning to gratitude for what there is, however tiny. Shifting our focus is our choice. When we consciously make that choice, our emotional energy shifts from that of exhaustion and stress to expansion and joy. From experiments done by scientists, we know joyous emotional state expands the mind giving it access to innovation and creativity; while a stressed out mind shuts down. Then, why not make a healthier choice?

5. Expand to unconditional love and acceptance of the other, however they are and however they are not.

Know that if you have reached step 5, you have progressed enormously on your path of evolution and transformation. You owe this enormous progress to the other from where your journey of dropping the upset began. If the other hadn't behaved the way they did, you would have no need to be on this path and would have missed learning, growing and evolving towards your highest self. Thank those who were at the apparent source of your upset, because without them you wouldn't have grown as a human being. What makes you bigger is not 'not getting upset' but getting upset, recognizing it and dropping it. Therefore; honour each one in your space who seems to be at the source of your upset and distress by being generous and giving them your unconditional love and acceptance, however they are and however they are not. By doing this, you serve humanity by hastening our evolution to the next stage and transforming what it means to be a human being and inside of that, make available to yourself a life that you love.

You may say - I am a human, not a saint. The above path is not designed for humans. All I will say is that the above path is designed for those humans who want to live in the expression of their Light, realize their greatest dreams in deepest communion with their highest self and have it all - deeply fulfilling successful career, joyful relationships, happy responsible kids and lots of nourishing me-time while making a huge difference to the world. If you live a small life, that'll be not because you didn't have Genius in you; it'll just be because you didn't want to walk the path to let your Genius out.

I acknowledge the journey to win the gold medal in the Olympics of Life is tough. Partner with a coach to provide you with tools, techniques, processes and space for your journey to your own highest self; who will hold the mirror for you to ongoingly discover your blind spots and support you to grow beyond; hold you accountable for what you want to create.

​May you win the gold medal, leaving footprints in the sand of time, feeling deeply fulfilled and joyous moment by moment.

Love,
Jyoti.
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