Jyoti Gulati
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How to Communicate Powerfully in the World of Others?

6/6/2018

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​The purpose of meditation and all spiritual practises is to have a visceral experience of love and reverence for oneself and for all beings. How do you define love? It is:

1. when you are able to unconditionally accept the other and relate to them as perfect, however they are and however they are not, whatever they do and whatever they don't do;

2. place their interests ahead of yours; and

3. have a relationship of equals. We are equals instead of I am better than you (I am more capable than you / I know more than you / I am more evolved than you / I am older than you / I am more experienced than you / I am in a senior position than you / I am wealthier than you / I am more powerful than you / I earn more than you etc.) or the other way around.

Therefore, to have a visceral experience of love; what one needs to do is to make the choice to love, moment by moment. Spiritual practises support us by strengthening our Agility of Mind™ leadership muscle to be able to make this choice powerfully. Doing all the practises as the end itself and feeling pleased with oneself for that is nothing but spiritual arrogance.

In the first Gear of Leadership, we strengthen our Agility of Mind leadership muscle which supports us to make a conscious choice to believe and to think, speak, do standing in these beliefs:

1. I am responsible for all that happens in my space.

2. I am extraordinary and I love myself. Being able to make the choice to be happy, fulfilled and grateful; irrespective of situations and other people.

3. Recognize and experience 360 degree view of any reality. Standing in a place where your Point of View is just as valid as my Point of View.

4. Being able to recognize our own upsets and have the agility of mind to drop them. Being able to recognize our small mind (ego at play) and have the agility of mind to shift it to our Big Mind (our commitment to our highest self).

5. Recognize that all complaints are the small mind in disguise and being able to use our agility of mind to see the positive aspects instead of giving in to complaining.

By actively working on recognizing and dropping Limiting Habits in all the four bodies of our Being - Mental / Intellectual, Physical, Emotional and Spiritual; and replacing them with Growth Habits; we effectively move from Gear 0 to Gear 1 of Leadership. This supports us to have an authentic experience of love for our own self; unconditionally accept ourselves the way we are and the way we are not; and relate to ourselves as perfect, irrespective of whatever we have and whatever we don't have. At this point in our leadership evolution, inner applause becomes so much more gratifying and fulfilling that we forever give up seeking external appreciation and approval. In this gear, we give ourselves the permission to drop all our masks and stand tall in vulnerable authenticity. We are at ease with who we are, we have nothing to hide, nothing to prove, nowhere to go.

In Gear 2 of Leadership evolution, we strengthen Being of Service™ leadership muscle by continuing to work at the level of habits across the 4 bodies of our Being. In this Gear, we have a visceral experience of Gratitude; gratitude for whatever there is and whatever there isn't. We have transmuted our default evolutionary survival instinct and are able to effortlessly place others' interests ahead of ourselves. We become a truly giving person, not only at an intellectual and physical level; but also at an emotional and spiritual level. We give not to earn, but to serve. We give not to seek approval and appreciation; but to make a difference. Our Being shifts irreversibly creating a whole new reality not available to us before. We finally understand how it is in giving, that we receive; how it is in forgiving that we are forgiven. We understand only when we forgive those who have violated our space, that we are able to forgive ourselves for experiencing the violation. 

In the second Gear of Leadership, we strengthen our Being of Service™ leadership muscle which supports us to make a conscious choice to believe and to think, speak, do standing in these beliefs:

1. Contributing to someone (through our time, attention, resources), without expecting anything in return.

2. Giving our time to someone else, without expecting anything in return. Volunteering for some cause, without expecting anything in return.

3. Love and gratitude for everyone and everything.

4. Doing acts of kindness for others as an expression of love and not for appreciation.

5. Experiencing 'You are extraordinary and I love you'; even if there is harm done to us by the other.

Continuing this journey to realize our greatest dreams in deepest communion with our highest self and having it all - deeply fulfilling successful career, loving harmonious relationships at work and at home, happy responsible kids with their genius joyfully expressed, lots of nurturing nourishing me-time, while making a huge difference in the world; we move into the third gear of Leadership. In this gear, we strengthen our Communicating while Being in the World of Others™ leadership muscle by continuing our work at the level of habits across the 4 bodies of our Being and have a visceral experience of Reverence for ourselves, for all beings and for all things. 

In the third Gear of Leadership, we strengthen our Communicating while Being in the World of Others™ leadership muscle which supports us to make a conscious choice to believe and to think, speak, do standing in these beliefs:

1. Being interested instead of being interesting. Listening fully without the urge to get listening.

2. Communicating only from our Big Mind (our commitment to our highest self), consciously chanting it each time before we talk to remind ourselves of what our commitment is so that every word is spoken consciously from that commitment.

3. Committed Listening – Focusing on our breath to still the chatter in our mind and paying 100% attention to every word the other person is saying, to their facial expressions, body language & tone to feel their feelings and experience their thoughts; to be in their world.

4. Step-Back Process before responding.
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5. Leading with Questions, speaking with wondrous curiosity only to ask questions inside of being interested in the other.

The leadership journey from Gear 0 to Gear 3 gives us the self-awareness, inner strength and courage to separate our thoughts, emotions and beliefs from who we are. We are no longer our thoughts. We are no longer our emotions. We are no longer our beliefs. We begin to experience the separation and recognize we have thoughts, we have emotions and we have beliefs. It is not 'I am angry' anymore. It becomes 'I have anger.' and therefore anger becomes as easy to drop as changing our clothes.

It is in Gear 3, we get the access to communicate powerfully while being in the world of others. We are touched, moved & inspired and touch, move & inspire others through our communication, which soothes and heals. People get attracted by our Being; relate to us as extraordinary; give their unconditional love, gratitude and reverence to us; and we open ourselves fully to receive all the love, gratitude and reverence that surrounds us.

Wishing you the joy of the journey. Let it lead you forward.

Love,
Jyoti.
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